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What to do

When did you stop laughing
When did smiles become tears
When did you stop laughing and
My love was replaced with fears

When did I stop seeing all the beauty
That is you
When was it that those dreams were
No longer true in the daylight of reality 

When did we start falling into that it’s
Not me its you
When did we realise that this is not the thing to do

I gaze on that emptiness and wonder
What to do 
Knowing in my heart that life will not
Replace you 

I hope your smiling too 

Sent from my iPhone

Did I wake this morning from reality
Am I still asleep at my computer where

I felt the heaviness of thought
Was that last night that brought visions

Concerns of my yearning to learn those

Things that I think I know tell me do what

It is go grow in directions that are unimagined

Feeding the body of enlightenment with the future

Of past history tell me do tell me how it is to become

That which cannot be imagined for I think just maybe possibly

That is the way I’d like to go for a while to reap to sow and eat upon

That knowledge yet to come am I still sleeping or has the feast begun to end

Sent from my iPhone

Defeat 
That inability of heart and mind
To maintain that which is unique 
To the one the self and only no need
Of companionship 

But that my strength should leave 
Me to the beckoning of those that
Would see me fall into that which is
Perceived to be darkness oh how they would weep to know of such new Beginnings

Rise and fall and rise again to once
More beaten into the submission of
Realisation that I can be nothing other than the end of my beginnings 
And the beginnings of mine own ends
To love and to have loved again 

And yet I would stop to kiss the cheek and wipe away the tears of
Mine enemy for am I not the begging
Of my own destruction in that I became more than I could be thus forcing those hands upon me killing myself without humility for by my mere presence did I not give rise to death 

Who can hate me more than I for am I not the one that changed that wanted no more of what was formally me am I not the one that bound my own hands so you could kill me as if unaware of that which I proceeded to be 

Your hate was mere confirmation of the love that is self for did you not love to hate me surpassing all that was have I not changed you in changing myself is that not what you hate the most that I took you away and clouded all that you once were are we not all lost now eternally 

Sent from my iPhone

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The computers ready 

 But where’s the certified ethical hackers course I’m itching to get started 😳🙈✌️😱🏃🐊🐜👌😜 

And yet there is hope

 

And yet there is hope

As I shed a tear or two

For lost memories and

Things forgotten too

Dreams unfinished for

Shortness of the night

Songs unsung for fear

Of being right from wrongs

And yet there is hope

Within those eyes looking

Back at me calm with no

Surprise of a reflection I

Barely recognise as once

Being me

 

somewhere between 

We wanted to say

Glazed eyes where dreams used to be

Do you remember do you still see me

The way I see you or at least I used to

I think we got lost along the way

Somewhere between I love you and is this how it is meant to be

Those little things that are missed

In the dead of the night

A sound a smell an option that just

Might awaken the dreamers delight

Those little things that bring comfort to a sleeper woken with the fright of not knowing where you are taking that second to be reassured and say yes it is here that I am and surely I am safe from harms way

Those little things that are missed only once they have gone

Today is not a good day to start anything
There is a dampness in the air and a burden
Upon my heart that is reminiscent of days
Gone by when the clouds of coldness hung
Low upon the hills of my soul. Such storms
We are told are necessary to reach those
Places like mountaintops distant foreboding
And yet calling every aspect of that which
We could someday be. Today is not that day
For my eyes feel the weariness of winter and
The grit of the beaches sand blowing in my
Face. But that I would find a place of rest upon
The shores of your loneliness that I may rest
A while in consideration of the distance yet to
Come. Is this what it is to feel to know of love
To be abandoned abandon others upon a beach
Of beauty with a heart to heavy to swim or notice
The nature of it all to wonder in the seas spray and
Not know one is even walking. How did I come this
Far without intention to move was I carried along
On the breeze of wanting to be am I truly lost to my
Own imaginations am I left on a distant shore not
Knowing sun from moonlight am I with the living or
The dead. How can it be that I feel so little but am
Aware of my connections to all things. Today is not
The day to be asking or answering such things for I
May not survive.

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Frisky little critters

is it the little Rays of sunshine 

That makes the moody ones smile

That little extra daylight that makes them stay a while longer than usual

Has the gloom of winter left the hearts and minds 

Or has the coldness of people gone elsewhere to find its company

Again for another year the madness had started oh so it would seem to me

Everyone remembers your number and the fact that you can be fun on those longer nights of lapping waves upon the beaches of hearts remembered imaginations 

Funny how the sun brings out the frisky little critters 🙈🚶😳️xx 

A culture of acceptable endangerment

I was involved with Rutland County Council social services last week, not the first nor I suspect the last time. Their disrespectful racist discriminatory behaviour always leaves me shaking my head. They willingly continue to encourage young people to leave Oakham for nothing more than pure economic class and discriminatory reasons.

I chose to ask my seventeen year old to leave home rather than put up with a torrent of abuse and aggression which was becoming increasingly worse. I had intended to try and hang on till his eighteenth in two months but the attempted physical intimidation was a step to far especially after the encouragement of his mother a qualified approved social worker (go figure) whom recently held me from behind while he punched me in the face (I never thought I could show/have such personal restraint).

I wasn’t surprised when the police and social worker turned up but I was surprised that their concern was that I had assaulted him. I told them to get on with what ever process they thought that they needed to follow but I felt it necessary to remind them that the last time they tried that after eighteen months of investigation their own conclusion was that my older son could not be with anyone more appropriately qualified to cater for his needs ie EBDS and the judges condemnation of their stupidity at allowing themselves to be used.

I advised the social worker that I would be very much concerned should they not support my son and send him back to Colchester as they did with his brother as soon as he turned sixteen only to be put out on the streets a month later by his mother.

I’ve yet to hear from Rutland County Council but I have been made aware that my son is in fact back in Colchester this being despite my having raised my concerns that he was in danger of becoming involved in a drug culture that had already claimed and ruined the lives of two of his brothers with their mothers enforcement encouragement and support.

That in essence is a reflection of the deeply inherent discrimination held not only by these small minded inbred individuals in Oakham but as a generalisation the mentality of those whom work within social services up and down this country. There is a mentality of not prevention but perpetuation of abuse without consideration of those young people involved. A stupid blind person could see what these individuals refuse to see continually meeting after meeting and in the case of these bigots here that refuse to act upon not a one off warning but a continued warning spanning years. I advised these racists that should they send my previous son back to his mothers he would continue his drug and alcohol abuse which is why he came to me in the first place. And now with the second child after having hindsight and my continual warnings pleas and evidence of the environment he will be going into they took a day to make the arrangements for him to go….

It’s this culture of middle class superiority that has children being sexually abused in their hundreds that has a revolving door syndrome for families that to their own detriment often approach social services for support only to end up being accused manipulated intimidated and bullied for generations for one involvement is justification for any further investigation even of the next generation.

As a farther I’m in my twentieth year of fighting these assholes and I continue to watch as my children are denied an education have their life styles restricted are continually put in situations where their actual lives are in danger all because racists don’t want them in places like Rutland and will go to any extent to exclude them socially economically and politically.

I’ve today been told by rumours that my son had been excluded from one of his two college courses. Things are falling in place. I haven’t heard anything from the college but that may be because I expressed my concerns last year of their encouragement of my son to drop two other options to concentrate on triple business studies and triple sport my concern then being that failure of either would result in him not obtaining enough grades to enter university “don’t worry mr wilks we’re fully supportive here” fucking cunts….!

Ya’ara

Stop the intrusion into my heart
I can trace your steps from where
You did start walking with my minds
Eye

I know you I said to myself as to
My spirit you said hi

I did not question or reason why
Have you come to me

I did not question or reason how
Could this possibly be that beauty
Has found its way into the safety
Of my reclusion for did I not lock
That gate and the key throw away
To confusion of past and history

Now do tell how it is that you walk
Within me as if you know my mind
Is this deceit of the lowest kind or
Will with time I somehow find this
Is what’s meant to be

Death and life now stand right there
Before me showing me there all for it
Does not matter rise or fall as my heart beats constantly from the fear the possibility near of a begging or an
End

And there stand death and life asking did you not know we were friends sister and brother to trouble and strife
Husband and wife to love and hate and all cousins of confusion….. Unfinished 😳🙈✌️️xx

43spiders:

Is this the biggest coverup in Rutland

Originally posted on Oh! Scandals:

aman-mehra

Strange goings-on in Britain’s smallest county. On the morning of 15 June, Aman Mehra, Rutland council’s “director of places”, was confronted in the council offices by chief exec Helen Briggs. She told him he was suspended indefinitely and escorted him off the premises. That evening he was found hanged at his home in Leicester.

Helen Briggs

An inquest concluded he had taken his own life and recorded a narrative verdict. The court heard that “disciplinary” letters were found in his car, but their contents were not revealed. Colleagues say Mehra, 42, was honest, well-liked and appeared to have no problems. Family members, however, say he had complained of being “marginalised” at work and was worried after “discovering things that he shouldn’t have”.

Since Mehra’s death a group of three independent councillors, David Richardson, Nick Wainwright and Richard Gale, have demanded that the Tory council explain why he was suspended or, if he…

View original 231 more words

imageThis is the officer whom thinks school assaults by staff members is not a police issue and also states parents have no right to complain if children are assaulted at school by members of the teaching staff “what happens in school should stay in school”

Racism in Rutland PC

 

Joe Lloyd Collar number: 1312 I joined Leicestershire Police in December 2001 having previously served in the Armed Forces. I started my career in Melton Mowbray where I served in several roles. In 2007 I joined an Immigration crime team that worked in partnership with the UK Border Agency. This role has exposed me to multi agency working which will assist me in my new role as PBO for Oakham Town. “I will be working closely with the rest of the neighbourhood team providing a visible police presence, identifying and putting into place community issues, along with tackling crime and anti-social behaviour within your area.” Send an email to your neighbourhood team Leave a voicemail for PC Joe Lloyd by calling 101 and follow the instructions to leave a message for an officer. When prompted, key in the identification number 1312.PC Joe Lloyd Collar number: 1312 I joined Leicestershire Police in December 2001 having previously served in the Armed Forces. I started my career in Melton Mowbray where I served in several roles. In 2007 I joined an Immigration crime team that worked in partnership with the UK Border Agency. This role has exposed me to multi agency working which will assist me in my new role as PBO for Oakham Town. “I will be working closely with the rest of the neighbourhood team providing a visible police presence, identifying and putting into place community issues, along with tackling crime and anti-social behaviour within your area.” Send an email to your neighbourhood team Leave a voicemail for PC Joe Lloyd by calling 101 and follow the instructions to leave a message for an officer. When prompted, key in the identification number 1312.PC Joe Lloyd Collar number: 1312 I joined Leicestershire Police in December 2001 having previously served in the Armed Forces. I started my career in Melton Mowbray where I served in several roles. In 2007 I joined an Immigration crime team that worked in partnership with the UK Border Agency. This role has exposed me to multi agency working which will assist me in my new role as PBO for Oakham Town. “I will be working closely with the rest of the neighbourhood team providing a visible police presence, identifying and putting into place community issues, along with tackling crime and anti-social behaviour within your area.” Send an email to your neighbourhood team Leave a voicemail for PC Joe Lloyd by calling 101 and follow the instructions to leave a message for an officer. When prompted, key in the identification number 1312.
 

 

You’ve broken my world as you appear in my exclusion shattered my reclusiveness with the intrusion of your mind which has left no space no peace to find in the darkness that becomes the light of unknowing undone are the illusions of times distances now my friend has come to find that which was forsaken in the future of a past forgotten in the reality of a dream remembered again at the beginning of an end I find you leaving to arrive in the past of what is yet to come and I know things could be no other way for what to come must be forgotten

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