Thank you for The Perfect Poet Award of week 40
Sweet smelling beauty
Fresh from my heart
Sharing the sunshine
Of which we are part
A red rose for my garden
Attracting the bee’s
To come and see me
And that space that
Is made for a pardon
To compensate for that
Longing to be free and
Spend my time in the fields
Of life looking and searching
For that other way to be
A red rose for my garden
Merely a representation
Of that I see with my minds
Hidden eye
Beauty in all under this sky
A red rose for my garden
Looks so alone now so
Sad am I for that
Red rose in my garden
I like the way you repeated the line. It made me a little sad for the rose. Good write!
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Thanks very much for taking the time to comment M.A.S very much appreciated ;D I started the repetitive line a while ago to try and cut down on the length and rambling of my writes ;o and now it’s kind of hard to get out of it ;s
Regards Spider..!
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Thanks for visiting Thursday Rally Poetry collection, next Rally is April 7-13, the linkz will be up on April 6, 10am, American Central! Regards, Blaga
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a sort of
meditation
looking inward
liked the repetition
fine poem
my brother
peace
este
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one flower lighting up the surrounding- so true both for flowers and beings.
visiting you from Thursday Rally for poets held at Jingle’s blog, Happy Rally!!
trisha
http://mydomainpvt.wordpress.com/2011/03/28/free-soul-28-3-11/
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We all shine sometimes and fizzle out, to be reborn again in some fashion, nice poem!!
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I can see this piece as a metaphor for so many things in life–beautifully done! And thanks for your feedback on my rally entry. I’m so glad you checked out and enjoyed the spoken word link. It’s such an important part of the poetry experience for me, being able to share and hear pieces.
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Nicely done. Love red roses in the garden too … and love you pup! Made me smile. Thanks!
Happy Rally days …
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Beauty is sometimes alone, even though we often think of it as surrounded by adoration. The single rose sits alone…beautiful! ~ Rose
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A contradiction of feelings … the freedom, the beauty, and then the sadness for the rose standing all alone. Loved this element, the sadness a surprise at the end. Wonderful. And how beautiful is the rose though, seriously; I love roses. 🙂
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a beautiful red rose, the beauty lingers through your repetitions.. loved it!
Here’s My Poem For Poets Rally
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This is really beautiful and so sensitively written. Nice to visit here today.
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A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
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Lovely poem. 🙂
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You pen with such grace and elegance. Timeless. Happy I came.
Kellie
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how is your day?
please find time visiting poets who were here for you but you did not visit yet..
Thanks..
have fun. 🙂
let us know via commenting after you are done..
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Oh how lovely….sad reflective ending. Enjoyed this very much. Please visit mine at http://poetrybysherry.blogspot.com/2011/03/perfect-pair.html
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So sweet, I wasn’t expecting the ending, so sad. Thank yo
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the piece speaks to so much, fantastic write
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lol yes we tend to expect a lot and that saddens us when we get not much in turn, maybe we should visit gardens and in turn we shall get the same lol
Enjoy the rally!
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Love the change of the mood here. Thoughtful piece. Nice! 🙂
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I like the change in tone from beginning to end. Thoughtful piece.
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Nice analogy. Repetition of a line gives it a song like quality. Great Going 🙂
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You’ve done a beautiful job capturing the emotions of our minds and comparing them with a rose. I personally believe we humans have a lot in common with roses….I had once written a poem personifying one. Thank you for this lovely piece.
Happy rallying!!
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Good methapor. 🙂
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That red rose is a wonderful icon for so much. Nice write.
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cheer up…being part of community helps.
Glad to find you and your talent…
invite you to join poets rally week 40…
simply visit me for details…all submissions are to be represented by the end of the week.
Happy Writing.
Looking forward to seeing you share your talent with us.
You rock.
xx
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Thanks Jingle visited… joined and working my way through the 18… a very positive community thanks for the invite….!
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Well captured -the parallels of the rose with the seasons of our mind.
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Thank you Butterflies… it is always nice to receive feedback… very much appreciated, Spider…!
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