Archive for May, 2015


Revelation

Is not abuse so often the norm 🙈😳😱🏃️xx

Bottled Up Sentiments. .

main
gaurded

This agonizing revelation
Makes me tongue tied
Misty-eyed
Submerging me
In a sea of disconcerting thoughts
While waves of fury
Crash against
The walls of my heart

I feel sick
Sick to the core of my being
Thinking of
The animalistic atrocities
He inflicted
Thinking about her
Being held
Against her will
Molested
Exploited
In more than one way
On more than one day

It all makes sense now,
Her hormonal imbalance
Sexual aversion,
Intimate relationships repulsion
All, an aftermath
Of the barbarity

For years
She kept it to herself
Pushing the harrowing memories
To the back of her mind
When finally, she unloaded
The burden of the secret, confined
Within her

It was a startling revelation
For her too
As the realization of being abused, dawned
Only when she understood what it meant

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What to do

When did you stop laughing
When did smiles become tears
When did you stop laughing and
My love was replaced with fears

When did I stop seeing all the beauty
That is you
When was it that those dreams were
No longer true in the daylight of reality 

When did we start falling into that it’s
Not me its you
When did we realise that this is not the thing to do

I gaze on that emptiness and wonder
What to do 
Knowing in my heart that life will not
Replace you 

I hope your smiling too 

Sent from my iPhone

Did I wake this morning from reality
Am I still asleep at my computer where

I felt the heaviness of thought
Was that last night that brought visions

Concerns of my yearning to learn those

Things that I think I know tell me do what

It is go grow in directions that are unimagined

Feeding the body of enlightenment with the future

Of past history tell me do tell me how it is to become

That which cannot be imagined for I think just maybe possibly

That is the way I’d like to go for a while to reap to sow and eat upon

That knowledge yet to come am I still sleeping or has the feast begun to end

Sent from my iPhone

Defeat 
That inability of heart and mind
To maintain that which is unique 
To the one the self and only no need
Of companionship 

But that my strength should leave 
Me to the beckoning of those that
Would see me fall into that which is
Perceived to be darkness oh how they would weep to know of such new Beginnings

Rise and fall and rise again to once
More beaten into the submission of
Realisation that I can be nothing other than the end of my beginnings 
And the beginnings of mine own ends
To love and to have loved again 

And yet I would stop to kiss the cheek and wipe away the tears of
Mine enemy for am I not the begging
Of my own destruction in that I became more than I could be thus forcing those hands upon me killing myself without humility for by my mere presence did I not give rise to death 

Who can hate me more than I for am I not the one that changed that wanted no more of what was formally me am I not the one that bound my own hands so you could kill me as if unaware of that which I proceeded to be 

Your hate was mere confirmation of the love that is self for did you not love to hate me surpassing all that was have I not changed you in changing myself is that not what you hate the most that I took you away and clouded all that you once were are we not all lost now eternally 

Sent from my iPhone

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The computers ready 

 But where’s the certified ethical hackers course I’m itching to get started 😳🙈✌️😱🏃🐊🐜👌😜 

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